We live in a moment where violence is installed, the headlines of the newspapers only show occurrences that make us feel trapped in a series of situations that bring terror, lack of respect and the invasion of human rights.
If we go back in our history, we can understand that these situations have always existed, I believe they were just not reported, because we did not have the means of communication we have today, so the information did not spread as fast as it happens today.
One type of common violence is hidden within homes, work, schools, even in a group of friends: emotional violence.
Various forms of violence can be identified, such as verbal insults, criticism, humiliation, devaluation, hostility, ridicule, indifference, discrimination, threats, rejection, blaming.
Often the origin of this violence It is at home, when parents, because they are tired or upset about their children's behavior, start using inappropriate terms when addressing their children, such as calling them stupid, incompetent, lazy, a series of verbal aggressions that has the power to achieve self-esteem, also promoting that these children, when they become adults, will repeat the same behaviors as their parents.
At other times, using love to make emotional blackmail With children, wives, girlfriends, it also affects the emotional structure. If you go to the party I will be devastated, or if you do not obey me I will no longer love you, you are horrible in this outfit, because your arm is horrible, your breast dropped, anyway, the aggressor tries to destabilize the other, diminishing and affecting your security of yourself.
These are silent forms of aggression, as they usually happen indoors, or even in a protected place, where the attacker is unable to prove what is happening. Importantly, a large number of affected people are unaware that they are being raped, although they feel terrible and saddened. Manipulated, some people even believe that they somehow go wrong, deserving this kind of aggression.
Another such device aggressive people it is to drive friends away so that your victim has no one to turn to or complain about. Since they leave no physical mark, their constant complaints may sound excessive and unfounded to each other's ears, as the abuser is often affective, manipulating the environment.
Even a super demand from the boss can be an assault when they are off-duty, overworking, or even using inappropriate language with their employees.
It is critical to seek help in these situations, and to believe that being respected is a right we all have, even within our family. Learn to value yourself and not succumb to pressure situations, put your opinion, choosing and setting limits. People with passive behaviors are the preferred targets because they cannot defend themselves and react to these situations by feeling overwhelmed.
Seeking a therapist in this process is important as it may assist in strengthening the self esteem, reviewing beliefs, better visualizing the environment to which they are exposed, promoting changes and especially holding the aggressor accountable so that this person can assume what they are living, looking for solutions and changing behaviors, so that they learn to defend themselves and be happy.
It's Time to Talk about Psychological and Verbal Abuse | Lizzy Glazer | TEDxPhillipsAcademyAndover (January 2021)