Reflecting on how overweight / obese people work, I see the relationship between weight and relationships that are clearly established. If you can choose between a small brigadier or a big one, this is the one you will choose to eat.
We don't have to look very far to see how these behaviors occur when some people come into a store to buy a shoe, try on a black that would be what they need at the moment, but end up buying a lot of different models, and find themselves coming out. from the store with four bags of shoes, because not only did he buy just the pair of shoes he needed, but he needed to be satisfied, stuffed with the emotional foods that the shoes represented at that moment.
The compulsion can occur in many aspects of our lives, and each one experiences this manifestation differently, a behavior we call loss of control, generated by the need for quick satisfaction.
In interpersonal relationships, the situation repeats itself in a more disguised and less visible way to the eyes of the people involved. The compulsion is transverted through the other's need to complete us, a need that also has the function of satisfying needs.
It is clear in the clinic as well as in personal experiences various relationships in which we can detect a sickness of affection, a need for the other to fill us and can fill our anxieties, emptiness, loneliness and anxieties.
From this point we can detect that a large part of people think fat, and really believe that the other should embody their idealization, and are disappointed when they face the differences, the incompleteness of their thoughts, their body (symbiosis) , and then cut off their relationships, destroy the other. Who has not experienced this situation or even noticed this attitude in the other?
Did the other disappoint you, not deliberately, but precisely? The other, with desires, desires, beliefs, differentiated references, and which really does not and cannot, clings to the desire and desire of the friend.
I think of the relationship of thinking fat in this aspect, of wanting more, wanting the other to be the greatest of friends, the best, the most understanding, the most present, to just share the way of seeing and experiencing everyday situations, the magical thought that everything will get better if the other fills them up.
And isn't food the role it plays in overeating people? The need to eat a large portion of food to be satisfied? The food that comes in as a substitute for affection, touch, kiss, attention? It is important to stop to reflect on how we relate to people, if we are not demanding behaviors that go beyond what would be normal so that two people can live in harmony without feeling harmed by the demand of partner, friend, family .
It is worth stopping and reflecting on how we establish our bonds, because there is always time to change our positions and seek to feed us in other ways that would give us pleasure, without sticking to only a few people, and may expand our contact network and especially situations that also It brings us pleasure in our lives.
the truth about being fat (June 2023)