More important than sympathy and dislike, empathy can have wonderful effects on your life. If you are not sure what developing empathy skills means and how it can help you, psychologist Regina Altoé answers some questions on the subject.
1. From a psychological point of view, what is empathy and how does it work?
Empathy is our ability to put ourselves in the other's place as broadly as we can think, imagine, feel. Many times, we can understand what the other said, but we can not always give the real dimension to what was said. Empathy goes beyond understanding.
We can't always empathize with everyone, so we can see that empathy goes beyond understanding. It involves affinity, involves being whole, listening and understanding.
2. Can an empathic person be considered more sensitive than others?
I find it particularly foolhardy to put it that way. I would say that it is a person who is more open, who can be more flexible, who can get out of his point of view and that does not mean that he agrees with the other, but that tries to accept what happens, what is spoken. Of course, this requires sensitivity, but I believe it is a set of features and not just a specific one.
3. How can empathy influence (or facilitate) interpersonal relationships?
Empathy facilitates interpersonal relationships and here it is important to highlight: at all levels, because for empathy to happen it is necessary to realize what is real, what is important to the other, from the referential of the other.
In other words, if we can think empathically, using the other's framework, regardless of ours, we will tend not to hear, judge, or pre-conceive of any situation, subject, event.
This is not easy, especially these days, because we tend to have the self at the center. Empathy requires leaving the self and opening to the other. Realizing this difference, we are not in the right or wrong situation, but in perceiving and understanding the dimension and importance of what is happening to the other. Let us clarify that this does not mean that there is agreement.
4. Do people with a strong capacity for empathy with others risk putting others' needs before their own?
They do not risk putting others' needs first, as long as they are aware of their needs. If a person is centered and aware of his qualities, his difficulties, and even what his risk areas are, let's say, being empathic is a quality, not a hindrance.
Regardless of empathy, putting the other first deserves some reflection on the part of those who have this behavior. This is not necessarily empathy, but it can signal a person's difficulty in dealing with his own things.
5. Is it possible to avoid this? Risk? As?
It is essential for the person to be aware of himself, even to be able to embrace and exercise empathy: to put himself completely in the place of the other. This requires maturity, discernment, flexibility, knowing how to listen, among other things. Empathy can be a helpful skill if used well.
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