How to face the end of dating during pregnancy

Ending a relationship is never easy. Regardless of the reason for the breakup, the length of the relationship or who decided to break up, is this a delicate moment that can cause a lot of different feelings and reactions in people? sadness, longing, disappointment, relief, regret, need to adapt to a new reality.

If this adaptation and acceptance of the breakup is complicated at any stage of life, during pregnancy the situation can be even more complex. After all, in pregnancy, the mix of feelings also includes concern for the baby and the pregnant woman's health.

"Due to hormonal changes the woman becomes more sensitive during pregnancy and beyond physical care, it is necessary to balance their emotional state," says psychologist Lizandra Arita.


Is it also a phase where outside opinions come in all the time and can greatly impact the decisions of those involved? which is not always positive. The ideas that the couple should continue together for the sake of the baby and that the woman is solely responsible for the pregnancy are common in a society that is still very chauvinistic. This kind of thinking creates pressure on the pregnant woman and generates feelings of guilt and dependence that are not good for either the woman or the child.

It takes a lot of courage to face the situation. At the end of a relationship without a child, only the couple suffers, in which case the mother needs to worry about her baby?

There is no formula or one way to deal with the situation. Each person's context and relationship is different and this greatly influences the way they think and act. In this text, you will find some tips that may help at this time.


1. Don't feel guilty

Manu Maia reminds that the woman should not feel guilty about the end of the relationship. Besides the confusion of their own feelings, can external judgments make the pregnant woman feel that she is solely to blame for the breakup of the relationship? and things are not like that. You have to fight the feeling of guilt to move on.

2. Not staying in a relationship that doesn't do well

The idea that the couple gets closer and more in love during pregnancy is not always consistent with reality. If the couple's relationship is not going well and the relationship is not healthy, breaking up may be the best option. The decision, which is already difficult under any circumstances, becomes even heavier when the woman takes into account the unborn child. However, pregnancy should not be seen as an obligation to continue in a relationship that is not doing well.

Both the woman and the baby deserve much more than a home in which the couple has a troubled relationship and where there is no respect or affinity between them. If the pregnant woman thinks her home is unhealthy and does not have a proper relationship, should she end the relationship for her and her baby's sake?


3. Think about the baby, but also think about yourself

Is it clear that thinking about the child's needs is of great importance in a termination during pregnancy? After all, this can impact the baby's immediate health and future life. However, it is essential that women also think about themselves and take into account their own needs.

“Being pregnant and very soon being a mother doesn't mean the woman has to put herself in the background. Work, study, have some time for yourself, take care of yourself, feel beautiful, love your baby, plan his arrival and enjoy his pregnancy! ?, points out Manu.

4. Seek support

It is important to keep in mind that throughout pregnancy, physical and emotional health must be balanced and both should be taken care of. One is as important as the other. Is balance essential? Reinforces Lizandra.

So does seeking support make all the difference right now? have someone to let off steam with, share concerns with. Enlisting the help of family and friends or opting for professional psychological counseling can be great steps in addressing the situation. If necessary, the pregnant woman may also seek support from her doctor to ensure her and her baby's health.

"The truth is that the pregnant woman is not alone, this is the reality of many other women, so it is important to have the support of people who go through the same situation," suggests Manu. The coach indicates the search for single mothers or with absent mates to talk to.

5. Adapt to the new reality

In addition to thinking about the arrival of the baby, which already promises to greatly change the woman's routine, it is necessary to adapt to the fact that she is no longer in a relationship. Dealing with changes is not an easy task, especially when you are pregnant. Motherhood is a unique moment where there is so much to understand, plan and do ?, says Manu.

Here, it's up to each one to decide what they want. The fact that it ended during a pregnancy does not mean that the woman will remain single: finding a new person and starting new relationships is completely possible and normal. Preferring to remain single and raise the baby alone is equally possible and normal. The woman should not feel embarrassed or obliged to follow one of the paths for other people's reasons. Being a single mother or embarking on a new relationship is up to her alone.

If the desire is to keep the parent present in the child's life, even after the couple's separation, is it important to reach an agreement that makes all parties involved comfortable? Mom, dad and baby.

It should be noted that each person is unique. Does this mean that situations will not be the same, as well as the feelings involved and the way the person chooses to deal with events? What works for one will not always work for the other.

If you are in this situation, look for your best ways to deal with it, always thinking about what will do you good and make the most sense in your life. It is not easy to get rid of external pressures or deal with judgments, but it is crucial to remember that your opinion is the most important.

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