What causes the relationship to cool over time?

Call every hour of the day, meet every night, kisses over there, hugs over here. As they say, dating is really a bed of roses. But the years of relationship, building a routine, and increasing the intimacy of a couple can be decisive factors in the fire of passion giving way to a frayed relationship.

CEAAP Clinical Psychologist Tiago Lupoli explains why dating, weddings, and engagements cool? over time. ? Most relationships tend to erode because lovers do not realize the peculiarities of intense living? intimacy, loss of freedom, sharing of emotions and difficulties, desires and distinct goals, among other factors.


If you are still in the beginning of a relationship, don't be alarmed. There is no rule, that is, not all relationships wear out. According to Lupoli, the dream of? Happily ever after? It is perfectly achievable. • The love that moves the relationship should not be considered as goal achieved, but the way. When the goal is achieved, the couple understands that there is no longer a reason to persevere on this path. Does this discourage lovers from exploring and enhancing their feelings for each other?

There are those who judge the routine with the great villain of relationships, especially of marriages. But it is important to know that it is not the only major factor in the breakdown of affective relationships. "The routine, coupled with lack of communication, excessive dedication to work, coexistence, intimacy and uncontrolled jealousy makes room for the weariness of lovers in the relationship," says the psychologist.

2 Tips To Know If Your Relationship Is Worn Out

Don't you almost kiss each other anymore? Missing the kiss is a great thermometer for the relationship. It is natural that at the beginning of the relationship kisses are longer and more frequent, since lovers find themselves under the strong effect of passion. The weariness in the relationship distances the lovers and more easily loses interest and care for the partner. Mutual admiration in low demotivates lovers to kiss, hug and share unique moments ?, explains Lupoli.


How often you have sex can also define whether the relationship is worn out or not. To maintain a satisfying sex life, the couple must be in tune or sex will be seen as an obligation. "Some sexual dysfunctions, such as erectile difficulty, anorgasmia and hypoactive sexual desire, may be the result of a frayed relationship," explains the psychologist.

How to avoid the distance between the couple

Communication is essential always: don't avoid the? D. R.? (Relationship Discussion). "Discussing the relationship openly favors the interaction between lovers, facilitates dealing with intimacy, gives the couple confidence, allows spaces of freedom and enhances mutual respect", concludes psychologist CEAAP clinic.

In addition to having a good conversation, some small actions are critical. Check out tips for maintaining a good relationship:

  • Take time to date. The idea is for the couple to spend time together on a romantic program, dinner, movie, travel;
  • Seek to maintain the relationship. Always seek to live as in the beginning of dating;
  • Be creative in all aspects of everyday life. Spontaneity is the # 1 enemy of routine.

The distance between the couple happens often, but it doesn't have to happen to you. Fights, disagreements and even routine are natural, but it is up to the couple to keep the quality of the relationship high.

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