Is having a partner to share the good times, going out to eat, preparing a meal at home, going to the movies and getting together in the winter a lot of people want? After all, it's hard to find someone who claims to prefer to be alone.
In fact, being in a romantic relationship is often associated with achieving mental and physical health benefits, such as reducing anxiety and depression levels and strengthening the cardiovascular system.
However, this positive effect will only happen if this relationship is truly satisfactory. Otherwise, science proves that being single may actually be better, especially at the onset of adulthood.
Medicine or poison: it all depends on the quality of the relationship.
The study that corroborates what your mother and grandmother have been telling you for years was led by researcher Ashley B. Barr, Ph.D. professor in sociology at the University of Buffalo, New York.
In 2013, Dr. Ashley had already done research with people of African-American origin that linked instability in affective relationships with symptoms of depression, alcohol abuse, and a worsening perception of one's own well-being.
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Given these results, the researcher decided to test if these effects would be repeated in a different population? and it really happened. For the new study, Dr. Ashley's team interviewed young white adults in rural Yowa, from families with married parents.
Questions were asked about the satisfaction brought by the relationship; the level of hostility, criticism, support, kindness and affection received from the partner; and the commitment of individuals. In addition, the researchers asked the population about the behavior of the partner outside the relationship, questioning the occurrence of attitudes that deviate from the currently accepted social and sexual standards.
Dr. Ashley's conclusion was that it is not really being committed that brings health benefits but being in a long, high quality relationship. The longer people stay in relationships with these characteristics, the better their physical and mental conditions.
On the other hand, being in an unsatisfactory relationship brings health damage, which becomes more intense as time goes by. In comparison, people tend to have better overall conditions when they end a bad relationship as soon as possible or simply when they choose to remain single.
It's not just marriage that matters
According to Dr. Ashley, most scientific studies relating the degree of satisfaction achieved in loving relationships with the health of individuals are with married people.
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However, in their two surveys, most respondents were not married, showing that relationships such as dating and other affective relationships other than marriage also affect health.
The researcher points out that this data becomes even more important when we remember that, today, people take longer to get married compared to previous generations, because there is a tendency to privilege studies and career.
In the transition between the late years of youth and early adulthood, does the present generation seem to face much more instability in their relationships? so much that two thirds of respondents reported having experienced major changes in their love relationships in the last two years. Thus, the damage to health from affective relationships can be even more intense than before.
That is, as attractive as the idea of being in a relationship is, it is no guarantee of happiness and well-being. So even if a breakup or being single can be a little daunting, try to remember what your grandmother was saying: rather than misguided!
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