When we get married, we carry a series of dreams that we are sure will come true, after all, love can do everything. This moment is very magical and has a special color, we feel that we can overcome all obstacles that even before the wedding already existed, but are ignored.
In the course of the relationship many difficulties may arise, some that we never imagined existed, and at this moment we do not always have enough ability to solve them. This is because we are too unprepared to share a life for two, because love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship where each one already has an expectation and a previous reference of what a marriage is.
Of course people are different from each other, but these differences are not always compatible and only after we are living under the same roof does it become clear, and it is at this point that we realize that the other cannot be the way we would like. .
When we cannot find a way to dispel existing differences and try to find a way to change this situation, it may happen to accentuate the incompatibility in the couple's life rather than solve the problem. One of the moments this can happen is in couple therapy, but each case is a case. Sometimes separation is even the most viable option.
Brazil recorded last year, compared to 2010, an increase of 45.6% in the number of divorces. According to the Civil Registry statistics released by the IBGE, 351,153 lawsuits were granted in 2011. This growth of almost 50% set a new record and made the overall divorce rate reach its highest value in the historical series since 1984: 2, 6%.
Separation is not a dream path and much less easy, because with this decision our dreams and desires fall apart, as well as a planning that previously involved the couple and often the children, we return to square one, we feel that we have lost the ground, we are without any stability.
After this delicate moment involving the dissolution of marriage, we gradually resume our daily lives and in this return we begin to look at the world around us more closely and even to be interested in other people. It is not always so easy and fast everything will depend on how each person deals with the grief of separation.
How do we know if we are ready to start over? The question is very simple, but most of the time it is ignored, because the need to have someone by our side is so great, beats the lack, insecurity, but getting involved quickly in another relationship is not the most recommended way.
The period of mourning is important for us to have time to self-evaluate, allowing us to understand what responsibility we had for the marriage to be over, as well as to evaluate the aspects that prevented us from accepting, changing, or even sharing with each other more assertive.
Only after these evaluations are we prepared not to repeat past mistakes and enjoy a new relationship with more freedom.
Getting a Divorce with Kids: What Parents Need to Know (April 2024)
- Relationships
- 1,230
