5 ways to get defensive and have new experiences

Have you been through those times when the urge to do something made you extremely happy, but did thinking about the possible reaction of others make you give up? The situation is common and most of the time we do not allow ourselves for fear of being exposed, which increases the chances of getting hurt. So we get defensive.

But while it is safer to live keeping everything that goes on inside our mind? and expose who we really are only to the people we trust? This leads to the loss of many opportunities to try new things.

If you are thinking of breaking this barrier and want to live new experiences, here are five tips to do that and finally start living the life you always knew you should have.


1. Start slow and go your time

You don't have to play everything you feel and want at once. Go step by step until you are 100% comfortable opening up. Is it easier for some to share what they are thinking and feeling, while for others it may take a little longer? and that's fine. To get started, post images and stories about yourself on social networks, tell those you trust about your deepest fears, write yourself a letter indicating ways to be more open, and take the necessary steps to get there. And no matter what you decide to do, trust the process and don't give up even if it takes longer.

2. Believe You Are Worthy to Share Your Story

We are always looking for other stories that make us feel connected to them. This provides some comfort as it shows things that may never have been exposed. But if you don't believe your stories, dreams and passions are worth launching into the world, then you are preventing yourself from connecting with others and even providing comfort to someone who needs to hear your thoughts, failures and aspirations. When you believe that you are worthy of openness, even if it makes you vulnerable, do you allow yourself to leave the comfort zone even when you do not feel under control? because sometimes these fragile moments are what make us grow and this is how we learn to adapt to the most disturbing moments of life.

Read also: 10 Simple Attitudes to Help You Overcome Insecurity


3. Know your weaknesses

When you are about to try something out of your comfort zone, it is normal to have a few moments of relapse. And knowing how to handle it is important. You can tell yourself a story that only you believe, and you may even feel sorry for yourself because you couldn't do what you wanted. It happens to everyone. But to overcome these moments, you need to understand what is triggering these situations. Are you stopping because you are afraid of what the other person will think? Are you afraid of failing? Whatever the reason, find out what it is so that you can begin this internal dialogue and begin the process of feeling comfortable with the feeling of discomfort.

4. Surround yourself with supporters

At first it is natural that there is a fear of connecting with others or sharing your perspectives and plans with those who are not part of your circle of conviviality. So start by opening with people you know who will support you and your ideas. Tell them something you are afraid to express, a dream you are afraid to pursue, or a thought you simply cannot contain. They will give you the unconditional love you seek, which will generate a confidence boost so that you can later express yourself to others who may not know you.

5. Allow yourself to be uncomfortable with bad results.

Even when there is the courage to act, there may be times when what you do or say will not be welcomed by others. If you feel like hiding and running away, that's fine. Learn to feel uncomfortable with these situations, allow yourself to live these feelings. By doing so you are giving yourself the control to face your emotions and anxieties head on.

With these small attitudes can come major changes in personal and professional life. The most important thing is to know yourself, to respect your own action time, but not to stop trying.

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